Greetings, Abby I have two sisters and am a 67-year-old male. I was just putting blinds at my younger sister Mitzi’s house. Although I was there, my girlfriend called me. (My wife passed away last year, and we have been together for nine months.) During our conversation about money, my girlfriend brought up my older sister Carolyn’s loan from the previous year.
Carolyn called me a few days later, furious that I had told my girlfriend about our financial arrangement. (It turns out that although I was there by myself, Mitzi had captured the exchange on her Ring cameras.) Both of my sisters are upset with me now. All of this began when I informed Mitzi that it was a mistake for her to hang around with her ex-husband, who had mistreated her physically and verbally years prior. After being jailed for domestic abuse, he spent some time behind bars for other offenses.
I didn’t know about the recording, thus Mitzi didn’t have my consent to share it. She didn’t take part in the discussion. My girlfriend is now worried because she had hoped to have a positive relationship with my sisters and now fears Carolyn won’t allow it. Any suggestions? — NEW YORK FILLED WITH DRAMA
DEAR DRAMA-FILLED: Just this: Keep in mind that if you hadn’t installed Sister Mitzi’s blinds as a favor, none of this would have occurred. There is no reason why you shouldn’t have told your girlfriend about the loan you made to Sister Carolyn, unless you were under oath to keep it secret. If they keep being rude to you, tell them that you will no longer be their moneylender and handyman if they don’t both apologize for violating your privacy. Additionally, it should be clear that you expect people to respect your girlfriend, at the very least.
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Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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