TO ERIC: I am a Spanish-American, meaning that my Spanish ancestors have lived in the United States since before Thanksgiving.
One acquaintance asked me where I was from, and I thought he meant the city I had just moved from. He asked if I was from Guatemala to get clarification. That question is aimed just at me in a social setting. I’ve also had strangers ask me these kinds of questions. In these situations, I think it’s appropriate to answer the question in return to avoid embarrassment or discomfort.
One could think that because I have brown eyes and light complexion, I should fit in. I take great pride in my Spanish ancestry. However, there is undoubtedly something that makes me unique. It might be my last name.
Unless it comes up organically during a discussion, I usually avoid asking people where they’re from.
It’s a bothersome issue, but not a major one. What would you say?
Where Are You From?
TO: The follow-up question, “Where are you really from?” may seem harmless at first. indicates that the questioner is thinking of a story that may or may not be related to reality. Many people who encounter this type of questioning discover that it really draws attention to differences, even though they may be looking for similarities. The query can mean, “Explain yourself to me; I don’t understand what I’m seeing.” Furthermore, that is inappropriate.
You are under no obligation to divulge any personal information, including your background, heritage, race, or place of origin. In the event that your response is rejected, then respond with another question. Why are you asking?
Questions can be sent to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or by mail at P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Subscribe to his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com and follow him on Instagram.)
Tribune Content Agency, LLC in 2025.
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