Greetings, Abby My nephew Will was taken aback when his wife revealed that she had never loved him and had been in love with her stepbrother since she was a teenager, following their 25th anniversary dinner. Will had cheerfully and fully supported her. (He makes decent money; she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom.) He was deeply upset by this.
For a few months now, Will and the woman he met on Facebook Dating have been dating. She is currently sporting a massive diamond ring that Will gave her, and she is a licensed nursing assistant. She frequently makes statements about her desires on Facebook. She’s primarily interested in cruises. She wrote yesterday that she’s excited for three of them.
She uploads images of her outings and has multiple adult children with children she spends a lot of time with; I’m not sure how much CNAs make. This is fantastic, however I fear she has singled out Will since he was harmed by being caught off guard. Is there a delicate approach to warn him to exercise caution so that he doesn’t become accustomed to it again? — AUNTIE IN FLORIDA CONCERNED
TO AUNTIE: I don’t want to repeat myself, but there’s a reason why people are told to wait a year before making significant decisions following a death. The dissolution of your nephew’s marriage would be an appropriate circumstance. It seems a little early to give the Rock of Gibraltar for her ring finger to a woman he has only known for a short time.
It wouldn’t be improper to advise your nephew to seek premarital counseling and talk to his lawyer about creating a prenuptial agreement before making any permanent commitments. (The divorce lawyer he’s working with might be eligible.)
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Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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